Have you ever felt like everyone around you has more money than you do? Whether you earn this feeling is familiar to many of us. In this story, I’ll explore where this feeling comes from, why it can be misleading, and how you can turn it to your advantage.

The Influence of Social Media

The first reason is social media. Lately I've been seeing more and more people on social media while driving. It seems like they're completely addicted to this. There’s an entire industry dedicated to making you feel inadequate and convincing you that your lifestyle isn’t good enough. Often, this is followed by an offer to buy a product or take a self-development course. The luxurious lifestyles you see online are often just an illusion designed to attract clients. In reality, things aren’t always as they seem.

Comparing Upwards

The second reason is that we often compare ourselves to those who have more money, a better car, or a higher status. While we might occasionally compare ourselves to those below us, most of us focus on those above. This upward comparison can lead to unhealthy self-esteem and a distorted view of our place in society.

For example, when you scroll through social media and see influencers flaunting their wealth, it’s easy to feel inadequate. In many cultures, including the post-Soviet region, the culture of understated wealth is underdeveloped, and people often flaunt their riches openly. It seems strange, but completely giving up on social media solves this problem.

Living for Today

The third reason is that many people spend money as if there’s no tomorrow. They live in the moment without thinking about the future. For instance, you might take out a mortgage on a modest apartment, while your friend rents a slightly better one for the same amount. Your friend may live better now, but in 15 years, you’ll own your home, while they’ll still be renting. Similarly, people often buy unnecessary things impulsively on credit.

As one quote aptly puts it, "We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like or don't know." Modern advertising thrives on convincing us to buy more, often leading to poor financial decisions, like a student with a loan buying a new iPhone just to keep up appearances.

Chasing Money for the Wrong Reasons

The fourth reason is that you might be pursuing the wrong career or goals, solely for money or prestige. For example, someone with a talent for art might end up selling chinese stuff online because that’s what others are doing, or enroll in a programming course just for the promised high salary. If you choose a path just for money, you’ll likely be outperformed by those who are genuinely passionate about their work.

When you’re doing something you love, it’s easier to accept that others might earn more because their work doesn’t appeal to you.

Seeing Success Through a Narrow Lens

When we see someone who seems to have it all, we can either feel envious or look for lessons to apply to our own lives. But there’s usually something we can learn.

We often don’t see the price people pay for their wealth. A high-paying job might come with long hours, a toxic work environment, or personal sacrifices.

Ignoring the Risks

You might not see the risks someone took to become wealthy. Where there’s money, there’s competition, and only a few succeed. We see the winners but not the losers. Many startups fail, and most young footballers don’t make it to the top leagues. We only see the successes, not the failures.

Moreover, wealth can come illegally, risking freedom. That luxury car you see might be the result of risky, unethical choices.

Viewing Success as Competition

Instead of collaborating, we often view others’ success as a competition. Imagine if, instead of hiding your struggles, you asked a more successful friend for advice or job opportunities. Collaboration can open doors that competition can’t.

Redefining Success

Finally, we’re often taught that success means achieving material goals, but life is more multifaceted. Success could mean having time for hobbies, working a job you love, or having a supportive community. Tennis legend Rafael Nadal once said he could earn more in a country with lower taxes, but he’s happiest in Spain with his family and friends. Money can’t buy happiness.

Rethinking what success means can lead to a happier, more balanced life.

In conclusion, the feeling that everyone else has more money is often an illusion fueled by social media, upward comparisons, and a narrow view of success. By redefining success and focusing on collaboration and learning, we can find true fulfillment beyond material wealth.